May 2011
63 posts
4 tags
3 tags
They've gone PLAID!
The car wouldn’t start this morning so I was running late. I don’t think I’ve ever sprinted through a parking lot faster than I did this morning.
2 tags
4 tags
Weekdays at home.
-I’m drawing on my tablet in Photoshop-
Mother: “Hey hey Emily what are you doing?”
Me: “Uh, nothing. I just-“
-She walks up behind me and looks at what I’m drawing. It’s a picture of someone pulling their intestines out-
Mother: “Oh…uhm… okay.”
This is why you should always
5 tags
I'm hopelessly single in my dreams too.
Last night I had a dream that I was at my high school prom (with no date of course.)
The whole dream consisted of my just wandering around the fancy building, walking in and out of the bathroom stalls and down the hallways to keep myself occupied, for some reason ignoring the fact that I was at the goddamn prom. At one point I think a stopped a terrorist attack or something, I’m not sure,...
4 tags
2 tags
1 tag
4 tags
If anyone gets this joke I will be enthused.
I bought a new water bottle recently and I wanted to make sure no one would take it so I busted out the label maker to put my name on it. Except instead of my name I labeled it “SPACEBALLS: THE WATER BOTTLE”. No one will take it now.
2 tags
3 tags
Keeping in mind it's a cool 60 degrees here...
There’s this jogger that I see every morning that runs alongside the buses going to the Middle School. Yesterday she was wearing a sweatshirt with a t-shirt on top of it. Today she was wearing just a tight shirt with no bra. I feel like there should be some middle ground, here…
2 tags
We have room for activities.
I moved some furniture around in my room so I could put my dog’s bed in.
She takes naps in it and then runs around on the carpet.
1 tag
4 tags
3 tags
6 tags
I was in Boston and I saw a sign.
It said: “Newbury Comics Upstairs!” So I ran in like:
…and then proceeded to buy all of their B.P.R.D., Deadpool, and Green Lantern comics as well as 4 keychains and a Star Trek wallet.
Then I sat outside on a bench and ate chicken strips. It was a good day!
1 tag
4 tags
2 tags
4 tags
The day I was caught reciting Shakespeare under my...
SCENE: The library, after classes. Very quiet. I am weaving in & out of bookshelves.
Me: “… Alas, poor country… almost afraid to know itself….”
-I start reading the back description of a book-
Me: “…it cannot be called our mother but our grave…”
-I put the book back, keep walking-
Me: “…where nothing… but who knows...
4 tags
2 tags
The Year I was the Go-To Girl for "What Would...
THE SCENE: Freshmen year, I’m eating lunch with the only group of females that will allow me to eat lunch with them.
Girl 1: Oh my god, I hate my phone sooo much! My mom won’t let me get a new one because she’s a such a bitch.
Girl 2: I threw my phone down the stairs here and she let me get a new one ‘cause it broke.
Girl 1: My mom’d just make me fix it!
Girl 2:...
2 tags
5 tags
"Please Wipe Down Equipment After Use" is...
A commercial for gym memberships just came on. I stopped going to my gym years ago. The only thing that kept me going there was the glow-in-the-dark rubber frog keychain I put on the lock for my locker. But I decided it wasn’t worth the strained muscles and creepy people staring at me. So I stopped going.
Of course, I wish I hadn’t. This girl in the commercial looks pretty good.
...
2 tags
2 tags
2 tags
I'm Still Missing a Hydrogen - I Think it Rolled...
I KNOCKED DOWN MY MOLYMOD MOLECULAR MODEL OF A GLUCOSE MOLECULE WHILE I WAS VACUUMING.
THERE ARE ATOMS EVERYWHERE.
5 tags
Bonding with my Baby Niece.
My sister brought over her little two-month old baby girl. I was holding it awkwardly and when she turned away, I stared into the baby’s eyes and whispered “A few months ago, you were a fetus. You resembled a small shrimp made of tissue”.
5 tags
Unrelated.
I have a lot of Gifs saved on my computer, but I don’t understand why I saved this one of small rabbits in clothing riding bumper cars.
6 tags
4 tags
6 tags
3 tags
Back to the Future, etc.
Yesterday this guy saw me wearing a Back to the Future shirt and we had a conversation about Deloreans.
Then today he showed me the model of a Delorean he customized.
4 tags
5 tags
2 tags
Yeah I got a new Portrait Photo. It’s a brain. It felt fitting. It’s also my Twitter icon.
Extra points to ANYONE who can guess what video game it’s from! <3
6 tags
I'm excellent at Periodic Puns.
I remember one time in my god-awful Earth Science class, we were learning about Bohr Diagrams.
Some girl thought she’d be funny and proclaim to the class that “Bohr Models are BOHR-ing!”. I glared back at her and motioned over to the Periodic Table poster and said “No, you’re just a Boron.”
The teacher gave me a high-five.
6 tags
Letting My Guard Down - Never Again.
A few years ago, I was running in my town’s Relay For Life program.
It was a very nice day, and I was walking along the track with my friend, Brian, and suddenly a butterfly swooped down at me out of nowhere.
It scared the ever-loving shit out of me.
The girl scout troop in a nearby booth started laughing hysterically at me, as well as this guy handing out ice cream. Glad you all...
4 tags
2 tags
The Woes of the Lactose Intolerant.
I just went down to the local grocery store to get some oatmeal cookies and VANILLA RICE MILK.
I’ve been lactose intolerant for years, and I can FINALLY eat cereal with milk again! And it doesn’t have a putrid aftertaste!
2 tags
3 tags
6 tags
"...Where are all the fish?" - My dad.
Check out this Ecosphere. It’s huge.
This is, of course, at the AMNH as well. They had miniature ones at the gift shop, and I would be lying if I said I did not want one. However, judging by my history with colonies of unfortunate sea monkeys, I doubt it would flourish, no matter how self-sustaining it is.
2 tags
5 tags
Curse you, Adobe Photoshop Elements!
I was drawing a comic in Photoshop last night and the program crashed before I could save it! D:<
7 tags
6 tags
I have these experiences quite frequently.
I was in the library writing lab reports for a group project (which is a lot more work than I anticipated, thanks a lot, GROUP MEMBERS) and this girl I know walks up to say hey. She asked me what I was working on, and I told her to leave me alone because this was the area farthest away from everyone else in the library and I intended to keep it that way that I was writing about potential validity...
4 tags
I told him that brains feel like mushrooms. As he...
My father can’t stand brains. They creep him out. So I’m not allowed to talk about neuro-stuff at home. But then when I’m around other people:
I WILL TALK ABOUT BRAINS WHENEVER I DAMN WANT.
