Last night I had a dream that I was at my high school prom (with no date of course.)
The whole dream consisted of my just wandering around the fancy building, walking in and out of the bathroom stalls and down the hallways to keep myself occupied, for some reason ignoring the fact that I was at the goddamn prom. At one point I think a stopped a terrorist attack or something, I’m not sure, that part’s a little hazy.
But I went back to the big ballroom and met a random guy I guess I knew (who I guess I had liked for a long time even though I have actually never seen him before) and he started holding my hands. It was cute, he started kissing my hand and shit.
So I started leaning in to kiss him, what was to be my first kiss at the time, and he flinched away and started yelling at me "DON’T SPOIL THIS NIGHT. NO. DON’T SPOIL PROM FOR US." and I was like "SORRY I JUST THOUGHT YA KNOW THAT-"
I bought a new water bottle recently and I wanted to make sure no one would take it so I busted out the label maker to put my name on it. Except instead of my name I labeled it “SPACEBALLS: THE WATER BOTTLE”. No one will take it now.
There’s this jogger that I see every morning that runs alongside the buses going to the Middle School. Yesterday she was wearing a sweatshirt with a t-shirt on top of it. Today she was wearing just a tight shirt with no bra. I feel like there should be some middle ground, here…
"Please Wipe Down Equipment After Use" is Apparently Optional Where I Live.
A commercial for gym memberships just came on. I stopped going to my gym years ago. The only thing that kept me going there was the glow-in-the-dark rubber frog keychain I put on the lock for my locker. But I decided it wasn’t worth the strained muscles and creepy people staring at me. So I stopped going.
Of course, I wish I hadn’t. This girl in the commercial looks pretty good.
My sister brought over her little two-month old baby girl. I was holding it awkwardly and when she turned away, I stared into the baby’s eyes and whispered "A few months ago, you were a fetus. You resembled a small shrimp made of tissue".
This is, of course, at the AMNH as well. They had miniature ones at the gift shop, and I would be lying if I said I did not want one. However, judging by my history with colonies of unfortunate sea monkeys, I doubt it would flourish, no matter how self-sustaining it is.
I was in the library writing lab reports for a group project (which is a lot more work than I anticipated, thanks a lot, GROUP MEMBERS) and this girl I know walks up to say hey. She asked me what I was working on, and I told her to leave me alone because this was the area farthest away from everyone else in the library and I intended to keep it that way that I was writing about potential validity issues of experiments. She stuck her face in front of the screen and started reading it.
I was writing about how proteins affect the levels of urea found in urine.
She walked away.
Further illustrating my philosophy of "If you can’t stand the science, get out of the lab.”